10/5/09

Congratulations to President and Michelle Obama, who celebrated their
17th wedding anniversary on Saturday with dinner at the Blue Duck
Tavern in Washington, D.C. The President is so romantic, after dinner
he arranged for a special dessert to be delivered to their table...
unfortunately Rio got it.

Police in Colorado arrested a man for standing naked on highway 34 and
pounding on passing cars. He was charged with "cock-blocking traffic."

The Anne Frank House museum in Amsterdam has started airing the only
known video ever taken of her on its YouTube site. The video shows a
young Anne Frank in the window of her house watching a cat play the
piano.

A man in Detroit was sentenced to two years in prison for stealing a
woman’s car during their first date. When the judge asked for an
explanation, the man admitted - he's just not that into his car.

A new insurance survey found that nearly half a million car accidents
each year are caused by female drivers applying make up - which
explains why Nancy Pelosi is switching to Geico.

The number one movie at the box office this weekend was "Zombieland" -
pulling in 25 million dollars. It's the best thing to happen to
zombies since Amy Winehouse and Blake got back together.

Kate Gosselin went on the Today Show this morning and said that Jon
withdrew $230,000 from their joint bank account – leaving her only
$1,300. Jon Gosselin said he needed the money because the price of Ed
Hardy t shirts went up.

... Jon Gosselin said he had no choice, if he didn't withdraw the
money, he would've had to extort Letterman.

McDonald’s is opening a restaurant at the Louvre museum in Paris.
Supporters say the McDonald's won't have an affect on any of the
priceless art in the museum... except now instead of smiling, the Mona
Lisa will just look bloated.

New research found that children who eat a lot of candy tend to become
violent adults. They also tend to become fat adults.

... The study also concluded that the childrens' parents are real Dum Dums.

... Which means that kid in Willy Wonka with the Golden ticket... he's
probably in prison.