9/11/09

It’s a big weekend here in New York City – you got the US Open,
Fashion Week, plus the Video Music Awards are Sunday… There are so
many tennis players, models and pop stars walkin’ around, John Mayer
doesn’t know who to have sex with.

32.1 million people watched President Obama’s speech to Congress on
Wednesday – down 20 million viewers from his last speech to Congress.
To help boost viewership, for his next speech Obama’s considering
replacing Congress with vampires.

Ellen DeGeneres said she promises to be “honest but kind” as the
fourth judge on “American Idol.” My only worry is that next to Simon
she may come off sounding too “De-Generous.”

Happy, happy birthday to rapper Ludacris – he turned 32 today. Wow
he’s 32 already, that’s ludicrous!

This is amazing: a baby boy was born in Wisconsin on Wednesday –
9/9/09, at 9:09 am, weighing in at 9 pounds, 9 ounces. Even more of a
coincidence, waiting for the baby in his nursery: 99 Luft Balloons!

And the doctor who delivered the baby… Wayne Gretzky!