9/25/09

Happy 40th birthday to Catherine Zeta-Jones and Happy 65th birthday to
her husband, Michael Douglas. To celebrate the couple exchanged gifts:
He gave her a diamond bracelet and she gave him a Medic-Alert
bracelet.

Michael Vick is expected to play in his first NFL game since 2006 on
Sunday when the Philadelphia Eagles play the Kansas City Chiefs. Vick
could see action in the 4th quarter... or earlier with good behavior.

What a historic week we just had here in New York City. Mahmoud
Ahmadinejad, Mommar Qaddafi, and Hugo Chavez all spoke before the
meeting of the UN Security Council. Historians are calling it the
worst episode of "Madmen" ever.

First Lady Michelle Obama hosted a dinner last night for the wives of
the G-20 leaders... or as they're better known, the Real Housewives of
the G-20.

Police in Pittsburgh had to use pepper spray on a group of more than
500 people yesterday, protesting the G-20 Summit. A spokesman for the
protesters said, "it could've been worse, we could've been at a
Pirates game."

A woman in Arkansas discovered that she had conceived a child while
she was 2 ½ weeks into another pregnancy. Jon Gosselin said, "Yes! I
knew I could do it!"

President Obama and British leaders accused Iran on Friday of building
a secret underground plant to manufacture nuclear fuel. The accusation
came after a secret meeting between President Obama and James Bond.

Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez said that the UN doesn’t smell of
sulfur anymore and that “it smells of something else...." Then Joe
Wison stood up and yelled, "he who smelt it, dealt it!"

A restaurant in Washington, D.C. has a new item on its menu named
after Michelle Obama called the “Michelle Melt.” It’s a turkey burger
on a wheat bun with onions, Swiss, lettuce, tomato, herbs, and mayo.
Also on the menu is the Biden Burger... It's a hamburger topped with
really fake-looking lettuce.

A restaurant in Washington, D.C. has a new item on its menu named
after Michelle Obama called the “Michelle Melt.” It’s a turkey burger
on a wheat bun with onions, Swiss, lettuce, tomato, herbs, and mayo.
Also on the menu is the Biden BLT... I'd read you the ingredients but
the list goes on forever.

... It's got bacon, lettuce, tomato and about 100 other useless ingredients.

Did you hear about this? Libyan leader Mommar Qaddafi’s translator
collapsed during his rant at the UN this week, saying “I just can’t
take it anymore.” Poor guy, apparently he was up all night outside
Qaddafi's tent on Coyote watch.